I don’t even know what to say here. I guess I just need to get this off my chest. This summer is kicking my butt.
It all seemed so great when I was signing kids up for stuff. On paper, it all fit. Soccer, golf leagues, tennis, summer camps, drivers ed, summer jobs, piano lessons, all while working on a basement project and the endless details that come with that…… So how did I end up here in this circus I call my life at the moment?? I don’t know! I seriously feel like I got dropped into some crazy survival game-show and I have NO SKILLS to win. It’s Hunger Games- mom style. That’s my current situation. However, the part causing me endless confusedness (probably not a real word)… I SIGNED UP FOR THIS SHOW!
What is even happening to me? Am I really this scatter-brained and forgetful? I continue to surprise myself. My first mistake is I have been relying on my own memory for stuff (when will I learn???) I won’t go into detail because I don’t think my fragile self could handle seeing it all on paper (screen) and not fall further into this abyss of mom guilt that I’m currently trying to dig myself out of, but let’s just say I’ve been late or nearly late to tons of stuff, early (a week!) to others. Forgetting things (like to feed my children), double-scheduling myself, etc. Just generally mixed-up and way behind the ball the majority of the time. On top of it why not throw in some self-image issues (welcome to 40, I guess?) and a child who decided the very moment she turned four that she would try out her naughty side. She likes it so far.
Help. I need help. I need more sleep and more brain cells. My 4 year old is smarter than me.
And another calendar because the two I’m currently using aren’t enough apparently.